I find myself in certain instances of unbelief and doubt after I’ve prayed to God about something. This unbelief for me stems from thoughts of “Am I deserving of this?”, “Is God really going to do said thing for me?”, “Why is this not happening for me right now?”… and the list goes on. I do, however, appreciate that God has matured me in being more self-aware and I will never stop talking about this (lol). In the midst of having these thoughts of unbelief and doubt, I am able to catch myself while it’s taking place. I’ve seen people talk about instances where negative self-talk and doubt sneak their way into the mind and how it’s best to challenge those thoughts and ask yourself, “Who said that about me?” or “What is causing me to feel this way, is it valid?”. I’ll admit though, I don’t always do this. Sometimes I just wallow in the thoughts, which of course is not healthy at all.
When the wallowing becomes too heavy I often try to pull myself out of this negative thinking by way of remembering and focusing on all the past things that have taken place in my life that I know deep down only happened because of God. I remind myself of the history I have with God. This is something I’ve heard my pastor talk about countless times when it comes to prayer and waiting in expectation for those prayers to be answered or even in moments where you truly are content with your life, and the enemy can’t stand that so now he has to figure out a way, by using negative thoughts and doubt in God just to try and remove you from that place of contentment. The enemy believes that we should be never satisfied and never in a place of peace. So, I take these moments to think back and reflect on all that God has blessed me with, all the times that God has answered a prayer, all the times God allowed favor to be my portion and I usually am able to snap out of it.
Philippians 4:8 (TPT) says, “So keep your thoughts continually fixed on all that is authentic and real, honorable and admirable, beautiful and respectful, pure and holy, merciful and kind. And fasten your thoughts on every glorious work of the God, praising Him always.” I actually keep this scripture on a note card on my wall among other scriptures that I look at and reflect on when something is on my mind or I just need a reminder of God’s word. However, Philippians 4:8 is a scripture that really speaks to keeping our thoughts on all the good and positive things in our lives. It speaks to those moments when the negative thoughts, the unbelief and doubt try to creep their way into our minds that we have the Word of God that tells us what we IN FACT should be focusing and dwelling on in our minds.
I don’t ever have a problem reminding myself of the goodness of God because if you think about it, it’s actually an easy thing to do and it’s something we as Christians should do more often of. If you take a moment to reflect on things you know deep down you couldn’t have done on your own, or there was no way you thought you could have made it through or out of something BUT you did- that’s all the evidence you need right there. Just like the scripture says, “… And fasten your thoughts on every glorious work of God, praising Him always.” We literally have to continously fasten and take hold of how faithful God has been throughout our lives, how he has always provided for us and made the impossible possible.
You know, my best friend reminded me a couple of days ago of the history I’ve had with God and it left me speechless. It made realize that when you have people who care about you and your well-being, those people that desire to see God give you the desires of your heart or just continuously pray for you in whatever capacity, they keep record of it too. Almost as a testimony to seeing what God can and has done for others, so surely he can do the same for me. But, she reminded me of the things that God has done in my life and it made me sit back, eyes wide open that the evidence of God’s hand on and in my life is truly all around!
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