When the Devotionals Don't Hit

There was a time when I was actively doing devotionals through the Bible app and felt like I was getting something out of them. Now I’ve hit a point where I am literally struggling and almost forcing myself to find a devotional on the Bible app to complete. This is not a knock to anyone who actually enjoys doing them consistently, because I used to be that person. However, here lately I’ve felt like they just aren’t hitting on much of anything unless it’s a group devotional - but even then, sometimes I have to press through those.

I believe that I’ve hit a point in my walk with God where He is trying to tell me that I need to put the devotionals down completely and pick up His Word instead. Truthfully, I thought I could supplement reading devotionals for the Bible. I was thinking since devotionals include scripture that would be sufficient and then if I wanted to dive further into the scripture I’d just read the full chapter to get the bigger picture. As I’m writing this post, I even think about some of the devotionals that I’ve read recently, and even in reading the devotional part before the scripture, I wasn’t getting anything out of it really. I didn’t feel like I was connecting to what the author was saying and how it applied to the scripture(s) that followed.

I actually read something online last night that was about Devotionals vs. Bible Study (https://faithfullyplanted.com/devotionals-bible-study/), and the author stated (1) that there are seasons where devotionals can in fact “keep us connected to scripture but it’s not always as deep or meaningful” - hence why I said I didn’t feel like I was getting anything super profound out of reading them here lately. (2) the author actually defined devotionals as, “works by someone else that takes a verse or passage and pulls application, meaning, or teaching out to share with others.” Now this could also be why I feel like they aren’t hitting on anything lately because I’m trying to force myself to digest what someone else has applied to their own lives and is now choosing to share. You know how that saying goes, “What works work someone else, may not work for you.” - yeah that’s what it has been feeling. I’m just like “Hmph okay, this is interesting, or oh that's a good point.”, but there is no profound revelation smacking me in the face from the reading. And the last point (3), “a devotional is all packaged up and “done-for-you”. Someone else has done the work of researching and diving into context and history and put together a beautiful message for you.” - whew 😰. This line right here was an eye-opener for me because it makes perfect sense! I literally don’t have to do anything but read, I mean I could try and really pull something out of what they’ve already said but the author has already done the work. So for me, I now feel like devotionals just gave me the bare minimum of what God actually requires of us regarding His Word and actively being in His Word FOR OURSELVES!

Dare I say this is where some of the disconnect has taken place for me - meaning that because I can’t find a devotional that speaks to exactly how I am feeling or if I find one and I read the overview or sample of it, I decide not to move forward with it. This also speaks to my season of reading devotionals coming to an end and that I need to stop trying to force myself to still read them (lol). Dare I also say, that there is a smidge bit of intimidation when it comes to just picking up my Bible to read … I immediately get anxious because I don’t know where to start. So rather me just open up a chapter, I just don't do anything with it at all. You know, a couple of years ago I did try to read the Bible in a year but that didn’t last long at all. I mean I’ve read a few books in the Bible but it has never been anything consistent, more like on and off.

Now, I believe that God is calling me to His Word, but much deeper than before because there's a reason that I've been feeling this way and have been unable to shake it. I know exactly where I can begin because I have a few books or stories in the Bible that came by way of conversation with friends or sermons from my pastors. That’s a start, right? Remembering that before I start reading any book, scripture, or verse to pray and ask Holy Spirit for guidance, asking for understanding, and clarity. Taking the time to read it more than once if necessary and reflect on what I've read, asking what does this says about God, his character, and how I can apply it to my life or circumstances. There are also so many resources to help with understanding the Bible and to understand scripture (commentaries, reading in different translations, etc.). I even like to research the standard definitions against the biblical definitions to gain a better understanding of what I'm reading.

So I can no longer allow intimidation, what has been familiar and helpful in previous instances to keep me from pursuing God deeper, and I certainly can't keep ignoring His invitation.

2 Timothy 3:16-17 (TPT): "God has transmitted his very substance into every Scripture, for it is God-breathed. It will empower you by its instruction and correction, giving you the strength to take the right direction and lead you deeper into the path of godliness. Then you will be God's servant, fully mature and perfectly prepared to fulfill any assignment God gives you."